When the student is ready the teacher appears
It's my birthday today, and I want to tell you a story.
One morning, years ago, I woke up in Lisbon, Portugal, distraught and ready to make the biggest change of my life.
I had barely slept, spending the whole night tossing and turning, tormented by the experience I'd had the evening prior…
I was in a club with a new lover and my friends in Lisbon. Like usual, I had created a story that this lover could be the one.
The one that saved me by choosing me.
But instead, that night, he came up to me in the nightclub and asked if he could take another woman home.
I had run out of the club and erupted into screaming sobbing cries of agony.
My friends carefully took me to our Airbnb and as I lay in bed I had this sickening awareness that if I kept making the same self-deprecating choices in men, I was going to hurt myself more deeply than I could comprehend.
If I kept looking outside myself for someone to love me, someone to heal me, I would never leave this place of inner turmoil.
I would keep ending up with men who perpetrated the deep, buried belief that I was unlovable, unchosen, abandoned and alone.
When the dawn finally came I knew I had a choice to make.
I could carry on down this same path, making the same painful decisions over and over again.
Or I could change.
I grabbed my phone and searched spiritual healers near me (lol), I found a Portugal Facebook group and there I wrote a post saying:
“Something is very wrong with me, I think maybe my heart chakra is blocked, I need help but I don't know what kind.”
Then, with the rest of the house still asleep, I got up and walked onto the streets of Lisbon until I came to a hairdresser.
I walked inside and asked to dye my hair flaming red.
With my hair complete I walked back onto the street, my spine already feeling more erect.
I looked over the road and saw a tattoo parlour, as if by force I walked in and asked to have tattoo “Self-love Club” on my arm.
I got back to the Airbnb, checked my phone and saw that a woman from the Portugal Spiritual Community had written back to me saying that she would love to offer me a 'healing'.
They say when the student is ready the teacher appears.
It was true, I had my first ever healing session with that random woman on a Facebook group, Mayatita.
That session would lead me to find a Workaway opportunity in France where I would first discover Tantra.
That workaway would lead me to a festival in the Netherlands where a woman would recommend me a community I could go to for Winter - Angsbacka, Sweden.
That recommendation led to me living in Angsbacka, a self-development and spiritual community for eight months.
Here I would come to fully come to understand what self-love truly means.
Here I was finally safe enough to see all the ways in which I had not loved myself and had not been loved.
In that 8 months I had more teachers and healers than I can count supporting me deeply as I walked myself from the broken desolate place I had been…
Into a whole, radiant me with a brand new life purpose.
That moment in Lisbon, when I asked for help on a Facebook community: I was acknowledging to myself and the world that I was not okay - I had become conscious.
When I dyed my hair I had begun to burn away the parts of myself that I knew needed to die.
And when I tattooed my skin with the words self love, I was immortalising a new choice into my body.
A choice to love myself against all odds, against despair, self-loathing, unworthiness, fear and pain.
A choice to carve out a new path of myself .
I was a student who declared she was ready.
And the teachers came.
And now, on my 32nd, I desire to offer an invitation.
I want to be that random woman on the internet, who perhaps cascades an avalanche of change in your life that you have been consciously or unconsciously looking for.
I am offering seven bold, beautiful beings a Pussy Queen Activation Coaching session for a deliciously discounted price.
During this 1hr - 75min call I will deep dive into the layers that stand between you and your unique radiance.
Perhaps you are longing for more intimacy, perhaps more pleasure, perhaps you are tired of self destructive choices.
Whatever in your life requires I will help to find it, understand it, and help it come into deeper radiant alignment.
Like going for a massage or float tank, you will leave the session feeling massaged from the inside, informed about who you and where you want to go, equipped with tools and homework of how to get there.
To celebrate my birthday you can book your session for just $149 (these sessions normally cost $350!)
